


If You Start to Miss Me, Remember; I Didn't Walk Away until You Let Me Go

by iBlackCherryi



Series: Isn't She Lovely (the 100) [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Artist Clarke, Artist Lincoln, Bartender Bellamy, Dancer Octavia, Depression, Doctor Clarke, Drinking, ER Doctor, Explicit Language, F/F, F/M, Falling Out of Love, Fighting, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Mild Smut, OB/GYN doctor, Rating May Change, Secret Relationship, Suggestive Themes, Teacher Bellamy, Teacher Lincoln, Teacher Octavia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-02
Updated: 2018-10-11
Packaged: 2019-07-23 14:11:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16160510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iBlackCherryi/pseuds/iBlackCherryi
Summary: Clarke had finally gotten over Bellamy, but she got over him by moving away. She went to a Med School in Polis and completely cut herself off from Bellamy. Well not completely. He was still her best friend. She found a girl there, a girl that she thinks she could be with the rest of her life.“Polis isn’t far from Arkadia, Lexa.. We can make it work. Lincoln and Octavia did.” Clarke was trying not to cry as Lexa broke it off with her. Her heart shattered, just like that fateful night before she moved to Polis.Those words haunted her. Everyone had said that to her. They took pity on her. “I’m sorry Clarke..” Lexa told her, her eyes full of love.Bellamy told her that when he told her, while she was in his bed. Finn told her that when she first met Raven. Her dad told her that when he was on his deathbed. Wells told her that before he moved across the world. Now Lexa.Now she was in her old apartment, smiling as best as she could as her best friends hugged her. This would stir up some old memories. Especially when she saw him staring right at her, smiling.





	1. It’s been a long ride without you.

**Author's Note:**

> I am so sorry this part is so short. It's only the beginning to a long journey! Happy reading!!

Clarke missed this, relaxing on the couch with her two best friends, not worrying about the mayor girlfriend and keeping up with medical documents. She missed the smell of the air freshener that Octavia used. She missed just the idea of being home, watching The Walking Dead with Raven and Octavia. 

   She had told the girls about Lexa, telling her how they ended. It's been a couple weeks since then. Clarke had cried too much about that girl in Polis. She wasn’t going to be hung up on a girl who didn’t want her. Clarke knew heartbreak all too well. She was ready to move on. And maybe be a single girl for a while. But of course, with Bellamy around, that was going to be hard. If she ended up wanting Bellamy again, she wouldn’t hide it. She was going to show him, just how she felt about him. If he didn’t like, he can tell her. 

   While Clarke was munching on popcorn, Octavia decided to nudge her. Clarke turned to the dark-haired beauty with a smile, “Yeah?” 

Raven, decidedly wanting to hear whatever Octavia in store, paused the marathon. Clarke was beginning to get scared. 

“So, why did I have to hear from my brother that you two slept together?” Octavia asked, making Clarke’s entire face burned red. She noticed that Octavia's smirk grew wider with the redness of her cheeks. 

“That was 5 years ago, Octavia... I moved literally a week after that happened,” she huffed, standing up. Octavia talking about that sure did make her crave Bellamy's embrace. “Where is Bell, anyway?” 

Octavia had to stop herself from awwing at her friends' embarrassment, “He moved out a year or so after you left... To get a house near his work..” She told her smiling up to her blond friend. 

Raven sighed dramatically, flopping on Octavias lap, “I say you two should get together already... He talks about you all the time… you two are always texting anyway..” 

Clarke stared down at her friend. She was texting Bellamy all the time about her worries and troubles with Lexa. Her heart skipped a beat, wondering if he felt hurt when she moved on to Lexa. 

Clarke was taken from her daydream of Bellamy sweeping her off her feet by the sound of a buzzer. She jumped at the sound and looked to her friends who were just as baffled as she was. “I’ll get it,” Clarke sighed, throwing the blanket on the two lazy bums on the couch. 

She pulled her short shorts down when she got to the door, in an effort to not look so risque. When she opened the door, she gasped and quite literally jumped into his arms. 

He grunted, wrapping his arms around Clarke’s back, “nice to see you too, Princess..” she could hear his smile. And smell the pizza in his hands. Clarke laughed in his chest, sniffling. She hasn’t seen him in 5 years. She pulled away to look at his face. God was he gorgeous. 

“Bellamy,” she smiled, holding his cheeks in her hands. Her fingers moved over his dimples and freckles. ”It’s been a long ride without you...” she choked out. 

His smile softened, now looking at her the way she had always wanted him to look at her. “I’ve missed you too, Clarke.” It wasn’t before long that a cough came from behind Bellamy. Clarke could see the blush on Bellamy's face, but what was it for. 

“I would like to see Clarke too.” Clarke looked over Bellamy's shoulder and noticed it was none other than the one and only Harper. Clarkes face lit up as soon as she saw her friend. Harper came and visited her once and a while when Octavia came up to see Lincoln. Harper had stuck with her through thick and thin. She was there when she couldn’t save Maya. So was Bellamy, but Bellamy wasn’t physically there. 

After she was tackled in a hug by Harper, she smiled fondly at the remaining boys, Monty and Miller. She gave them both a happy smile with a hug. She figured Jasper wouldn’t be here. He hated her guts when she went to tell him Maya had died. Why would she think now would be any different? 

“I tried to get him to come to Clarke... He wouldn’t listen,” Monty said before Clarke nodded to him. She knew. He hadn’t seen her since that day in the hospital. Clarke had tried hard to save Maya, she did, but she was DOA. 

Bellamy patted her back before leading her to the kitchen where he had slipped the pizza in. She gave him a smile, laying her head on his shoulder. It felt good to be in his arms again. 

~~ 

After pizza, everyone has gathered around in the living room. Harper and Monty were being the perfect couple they always were, cuddled up together on the chair. Miller had left earlier, having to go tend to a sick Bryan. Octavia had taken a phone call from her work about some unknown matter, while Raven had sat on the floor in front of Bellamy and Clarke. Clarke had her legs across Bellamy's lap, holding his phone high above her head, not letting him see who was texting. 

“Clarke, give me my phone,” Bellamy said, his hands, finally falling on her legs in defeat. Bellamy hoped to god it wasn’t Echo. He had been sleeping with Echo the five years Clarke and he really didn’t want her to see Echo sexting him, even though she just now started that when he told her Clarke was coming home. He knew he had hurt her that morning five years ago when he told her that it would be a one-time thing, that he didn’t see her that way; even though he did. Clarke was all he thought about when he did this kind of stuff now. Even during it. 

It was too late, Clarke still having her fingerprint in his phone, unlocked it to see who it was.  _ Echo, are you kidding me? _ She clicked on the name and was bombarded with dirty photos from the girl. She pretended that it didn’t hurt as she threw the phone at his chest, “you are disgusting…” she spat angrily as she sat up in her seat, letting Octavia sit back down. 

“Clarke..” Bellamy sighed, scooting beside her so Octavia could have an armrest. Octavia frowned at the two, wondering what was going on. She ignored it as she got a text from Lincoln. Her face lit up with joy as he wished her a good night. 


	2. Some People Search years to find what I have right in Front of Me

Clarke rushed out of the house, running late for work. God, she got drunk last night for Lincoln’s birthday at the Dropship and slept in. Gah!! She was such an idiot! She knew she had 1st shift. She glance at the watch on her wrist as it showed 6:42. 

In her urgency she didn’t see her “best” friend on the hood of his truck, waiting on her. She was mad at him for talking to Echo, the girl who fucked him over in high school. The one who cheated on him with the entire football team. Now he was fucking Echo in his bed. Again

She didn’t notice him until he yelled out her name. When he did, her papers flew everywhere in her panic. She took a second to catch her breath before turning to Bellamy, who had all of her papers in his hand as he smiled sheepishly, “sorry, Princess..” 

She gave him a smile, forgetting about work or Echo for the time being. But it came back to her when his phone dinged and he quickly silenced it. He looked back at her and saw the pained expression on her face. His heart dropped when she looked down.

“Hey, Bell..” she told him, grabbing her papers from his hand. “Uh, I’ll talk to you later… I have to get to work..” she gave him a smile that made his heart sore. God did he miss Clarke and everything about her. 

“Let me take you... I have to go that way for work anyway,” he said, reaching out for her hand, “I have your favorite coffee in the truck, waiting..” he added, knowing it would seal the deal with her. 

She frowned at him, “you are no fair, Mr. Blake.. Bribing me to get me to ride with you..” she shook her head teasingly at her friend. He was just happy she wasn’t pissed at her because of last night. He explained some things to her when he was working for Lincoln's party. He explained that it was no strings attached with Echo. How he didn’t feel anything but sexual things for Echo. She even said she was fine with it before asking why he chose Echo. 

So he told her. He told her how Echo was there when Clarke left. He told her how he was hurt by Gina then a week later Clarke left. They were fine! They were still best friends. They were going to tell each other everything. That is until Echo decided to show up for her friends birthday. Lincoln had no idea that Bellamy had this weird love triangle with Echo and Clarke. 

To say the least, Clarke was pissed that let alone, Echo was there, but she was cutting in --like she was jealous of Clarke and Bellamy for some reason -- on Clarkes conversations with Bellamy and somehow ended up spilling her drink on Clarkes white shirt. Clarke was taken care of-- of course by Bellamy giving her his jacket, making Echo even more upset. 

Clarke ended up getting wasted with Octavia and Raven, but she only suffered the consequences. She had work 7 o’clock in the morning, they didn’t. But now, it was all worth it. Clarke was sitting in Bellamy's truck he's had since his 15th birthday as she sipped on her mint cocoa coffee as he hummed along to whatever was on the radio. Clarke didn’t pay any attention to it, only recognizing a couple cords in the song. She was looking at Bellamy, wishing she didn’t have this killer migraine. 

It was a while before he actually talked. “So… Clarke… that was Echo earlier. I told her to stop sending me those photos. We’ve never done that… I think shes getting jealous..” he chuckled looking over to the adorable Clarke that was blowing in her steamy cup. 

“You think?” she let out a laugh. Echo was definitely mad. Clarke was back and she thinks that she can steal Bellamy away from her. “Why did you go back to her. You guys ended badly in high school.. So why now?” she looked over at him.

Bellamy sighed, stopping at a stoplight, “well… I guess she was just familiar. And I was in need of someone after that night. I didn’t want strings attached so I don’t consider myself dating her..” he grumbled out. He felt very bad about doing this with Echo when Clarke was sitting right here beside him. 

“So you’re open to other people?” 

Bellamy was not expecting that. Not her saying that. He couldn’t look at her but he did reply, “yeah..” he muttered, red faced as he parked near the hospital. What came after that shocked him and turned him on at the same time. 

Clarke wasn’t playing any games this go around. If Bellamy didn’t want it, he could tell her. She was going to show him that she wanted him. She leaned over, putting her hand on his upper thigh --squeezing just a bit-- before kissing him deeply. 

She wasn’t expecting Bellamy to return her kiss, let alone pull her closer by the waist, but she was glad. Glad that he finally chose her. When she pulled away she just smiled at him, “My lunch is at 1.. I expect you to be here..” she told him before grabbing her things 

“Yes mam,” he saluted her, “and Clarke?” he called for her, making her turn around. She blushed at the lipstick that had smeared on his lips, yet he was proud of her smeared lipstick. She had the urge to take a picture and send it to that bitch, Echo. 

“Yeah?”

Bellamy leaned in and kissed her softly, “I’m all yours now..” he whispered on her lips. He had to make her feel turned on as he had to go to work with a boner. She would at least be thinking of him all day, if she wasn’t already. But he was met with delight when her breathing hitched against his lips. God, this woman could drive a man wild. 

Clarke knew that he was trying to rile her up, so she reached across him to brush her hand against his crotch, smirking, “be good for me when I’m at work, eh?..” she whispered in his ear, squeezing his thigh. 

Bellamy growled possessively at her as she slipped out of his truck watching her throw her head over her shoulder to look at him with lustful eyes. He watched her go inside the building, grumbling. God he hoped this… problem would go away before he got to work. 

~~

Clarke and Bellamy sat in the cafe that was across from the Dropship, laughing about. Clarke was happy her hand was in Bellamys as he squeezed it with his eyes, throwing his head back in a fit of laughter. She was happy Bellamy was here, with her. 

Bellamy wiped his eye as he looked out the window to see two old ladies bickering. Clarke was doing an impersonation of the two, and what she said was hilarious. 

“Ow! Don’t hit me, you know I bruise easily, Judith,” she grumbled in her best old lady dialect. “Now you don’t hit me, Claudia. It's not my fault Jerry had sex with me more than you in high school. I’m obviously the prettier of the two of us.” Clarke smiled, trying not to break character but Bellamys smile was to much with his laugh. She began to giggle, giggle at him. 

After the two old ladies left and Bellamy and Clarke got their food, they began to settle down. Clarke knew she needed to ask him about Echo, seeing as Echo worked here and kept eyeing the two. She didn’t want to ruin their first date though. Thankfully, Bellamy was the one to bring it up. “Clarke, just know, that I ended it with Echo. I told her to stop texting me. I’m completely your, I promise..” 

Clarke couldn’t help but to smile. She liked the sound of that. Bellamy would be hers. She nodded to him, “okay.. But can I ask you something?” she muttered, looking down. She wanted nothing more than to lean across the table and kiss him, so the whole world would know. But she had broken up with Lexa months ago and ‘paparazzi’ were still trailing her. 

“Of course Clarke..” Bellamy replied, his body straightening at her serious tone. “What is it?”

Clarke swallowed, getting extremely nervous he would take it the wrong way. “Bellamy..” she started, sitting up straight, “journalist are still on my trail after my break up with Lexa.. They will be for a while. I don’t want you to get brought into that…” she trailed off, scared to tell him the real reason.

Bellamy smiled and squeezed her hand, “You want to keep our relationship a secret?” he asked her quietly. He took Clarkes release of breath as a yes. “Okay.. It’ll be fun. Thrill seeking. I’m in.” 

Clarke smiled brightly before going to hug him tightly from across the table. “Thank god you didn’t take offense to that..” Clarke praised as Bellamy hugged her back. He chuckled in her ear, holding her close. 

“Never, Princess..” he chuckled in her ear, “I would never let this go.. People search years for this... I have it right in front of me..” 


	3. All the Love Songs were About You

Clarke sat on the bar as she watched the people dance. They were so happy, even though they were intoxicated with the alcohol her boyfriend was serving to them. It's been about a month since Bellamy and her started this little shindig and both of them were loving the thrill of sneaking in the back room to make out after a night full of teasing. 

She was also thrilled to know that Bellamy was holding back. Of course, this also frustrated her when they were in the heat of the moment and her insides were on fire. She has never known Bellamy Blake to wait, especially when a girl is ready. 

Echo and Gina were his only girlfriends he's ever had. All the other women he has slept with were one-night stands or continuous booty calls. So seeing him resist the urge to fuck her right then and there was fascinating. 

As Clarke swayed back and forth to whatever Jasper had on when Bellamy leaned into her neck to kiss it, startling her. They had always teased each other in public, seeing who would crack first, but they never touched one another, in fear of someone seeing them. This was new, yet it was exciting. 

Clarke turned to look at him as he moved away, his face showed as if he realized what he did and she couldn’t help but giggle. His face softened at her laugh, figuring she didn’t mind it. He did it in the mornings after she slept over. 

Bellamy looked over to their group of friends near the DJ booth, dancing and talking to Jasper as he DJed. “I probably shouldn’t do that here, should I?” he chuckled. Clarke followed his gaze to their friends, shaking her head at Raven and Octavia's dancing. 

In the time of this relationship, Clarke had moved into her own place, where she could paint into the wee hours of the night. She didn’t get to see the girls that much anymore since she had work, but they had agreed that every other Saturday, they would come to the Dropship so they could have some fun. 

“Nah.. but… we can go back to my place and do it..” she whispered, tapping his cheek. It wasn’t unusual to see the two of them practically flirting, so when Octavia put her hands on Clarke’s knees to pull her out of her lovely daze, she paid no mind to the sexual tension they had. 

Clarke let out a yelp, snapping her head to Octavia who wore a smirk. She felt Bellamy step back, not pressing himself against her again. 

“God, Octavia, do you have to scare me like that?” Clark put a hand over her heart and smiled at the girl. Bellamy chuckled at his girls, cleaning a glass for the two.

“Yes, yes I do, Clarke… two whiskey shots please!” She turned to her brother who was already pouring the liquid. Clark smiled at him, her eyes drifting down his body before Octavia grabbed her arm, “come! You have to dance with us!!” 

Clarke gasped and before she knew it, she was handed a whiskey shot and dancing with her girls. She smiled, dancing along to the song that was playing when she felt someone's hands on her waist. She was too wasted to notice who it was so she just kept dancing, sometimes pushing the hands off her hips when they got to high on her body. 

Sooner than later, she was handed a drink from the mystery dancer. She looked over to Bellamy, realizing it wasn’t Bellamy dancing with her, and threw the drink into the dude's face. 

“What the Fuck!?” the guy cursed, rubbing his face as Clarke walked off to the bar. She noticed that Octavia had been cut off by her brother and was pouting at the bar and Raven had left with some guy she met. 

Clark sat beside O and sighed, “fucking men..” she cursed, making Octavia nod and glare at her brother. The blonde followed her gaze, smiling when she saw Bellamy looking their way. He had a towel on his shoulder as he strutted over to them.

“I’m cutting you off to Clarke,” he muttered, grabbing a glass to fill it with water for her. 

“Fine by me,” she smiled at him and he smiled back. 

Octavia looked between the two and sighed, “just fuck already..” Clarke's face burned red and Bellamy just chuckled, shaking his head at his sister.

“How do you know we haven’t already?” 

Clarke gasped at him. They haven’t, besides the one night before she left 5 years ago. Bellamy smirked at Clarke, making Octavia glare at the two, trying to figure it out. 

“My shift is over now, I was just helping until you two were ready to go..” Bellamy explained, handing Clarke his keys, “go to the truck and crank it up, I’ll be out in a minute..”

And he was. He was out before Clarke could even start the vehicle. 

None the less, they had a good time after they dropped Octavia off. It included a lot of kissing but mostly trying to sober Clarke up some so they could have an intelligent conversation. 

It worked. Clarke had pulled out her dad's old guitar and handed it to Bellamy, begging him to sing. It was that time of night when Bellamy was only in his boxers and Clarke had her Pj’s on. It was Bellamy's favorite time of night. 

Bellamy put the strap around his body, sighing, “fine, just shut that pretty mouth of yours so I can sing, Princess..” Bellamy teased, giving her a tease that made her wiggle but shut up as she sat. 

Bellamy cleared his throat and strummed a couple cords. Bellamy was a talented musician, he seemed like he enjoyed being up on stage when he still had his band but he wanted to be a teacher. He wanted to geek out about History like he always did. She didn’t mind. She loved to watch him rant about movies that were inaccurate to the actual story and she also loved to watch him play. 

He began to sing his song and she instantly recognized it. After a few verses, she began to sing with him, standing up to dance around him. His voice showed amusement as he sang,

**_“I see you there”_ **

**_“Dancin like you don’t have a clue”_ **

**_“And I knew here”_ **

**_“All the love Songs were about you”_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter is short. All of them are so far. Imma try to make them longer put that means less frequent updates.   
> Comment what you want!   
> Longer chapters or frequent updates?


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